Family Portrait
by Sandylee007
Summary: When JJ realizes just how badly she's hurt Reid it may be too late. Some bitter mistakes can't be taken back.     SPOILERS TO 7x02       ONESHOT                  NO PAIRINGS


A/N: **THIS AUTHOR'S NOTE, AND ESPECIALLY THE CHAPTER, INCLUDE SPOILERS TO THE LATEST EPISODE (7x02). SO BEWARE! **

I haven't actually seen the episode 7x02 yet, but I've got a pretty solid frame in my head as to what happens in it. And I was really, really disappointed with JJ – she expects far too much out of poor Reid and jabs him to where it hurts with the trust thing. Even without actually seeing the fight scene I felt hurt for him. (grits teeth) And, as often happens with me, those feelings transformed into some sort of a fic. (smirks sheepishly)

WARNINGS: SPOILERS, a couple of foul words, the BAU family in shambels… Ya know, for my story that's mild stuff. (gawks)

**NO PAIRINGS! **

DISCLAIMER: Have you seen any pigs, cows or horses flying? Unless you have, the day that I own something of 'CM' hasn't dawned yet. (pouts)

Awkay… (takes a deep breath) I'm getting really fidgety, so I'll have to get this baby shot out before I change my mind. I REALLY hope you'll enjoy the ride!

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><p>Family Portrait<p>

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><p>'<em>The only correct actions are those that demand no explanation and no apology.<em>'

(Red Auerbach)

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><p>Against all odds, even that night Jennifer Jareau waited. Every single time even the slightest sound disturbed the quiet of the darkening evening she fidgeted, her whole body filling with desperate hope.<p>

Spencer Reid never showed up.

It shouldn't have hurt so much, really. He'd stopped coming ten weeks after the nightmare of lies and deceit began. But tonight… Tonight she would've really needed to see him, for entirely selfish reasons.

She needed to see him, to get the second chance to say all the _right_ things instead of those bitter strayed ones.

She needed to see him, to know that she hadn't managed to damage something beyond repair.

She needed to see him, to know that she hadn't succeeded in actually breaking him.

Because facing a world where she'd lost him… She didn't even want to imagine it.

In the end she couldn't take the pressure building up behind her ribcage any longer. Carefully making sure that both Will and Henry were asleep she got dressed, wrote a brief note and left the house, jumping into her car.

Spencer wouldn't come to her this time, which meant that she'd have to go to him.

The drive to Spencer's apartment felt torturously long, and she thought the stairs leading to his door would never end. But in the end she froze only steps away from her destination, cold seeping even to the core of her being.

Spencer's door was slightly ajar. A thin ray light seeped into the shadowy hallway.

She swallowed and gulped, her stomach twisting uncomfortably. Suddenly she wished she'd taken her gun along. "Spence?" There was no response. She couldn't hear a sound coming from the apartment. The cold inside her intensified to such extend that she could barely breathe. "Spence, are you okay?"

Slowly and soundlessly she opened the door and took a step inside to discover that she wasn't alone. But instead of Spencer Derek Morgan stood in the middle of the living room, his shoulders slumped and a mixture of anger, helplessness and fear evident on his face. On the floor not far from him was what looked like a glass, smashed to pieces.

JJ shivered. At that moment it took a lot of her not to walk away. "Derek? What's going on?"

"He left, without a note", was thrown back at her in a razor sharp tone that startled her a little. Derek's eyes weren't any gentler when they clashed with hers. "I heard that little talk between you two, and came here to talk to him. He was already gone."

JJ felt sick to her stomach with remorse. "You… heard?"

Derek grit his teeth so hard that it must've been painful. "He trusted you, enough to be vulnerable before you. I don't think you have a clue how much you mean to him." There was no mistaking the look in her dark skinned friend's eyes. If he was less of a man he might've very well raised his hand against her. By then he was shaking with fury. "How could you think that little of him, Jennifer? After all these years… Don't you know him at all?"

She swallowed, a searing sensation filling her eyes. "I…" Her lips kept moving but no sound came. There were no excuses, no room for reasoning. It took all her courage to meet Derek's eyes. "I'm sorry", was all she managed. And far too late, she realized that those words should've been spoken a lot sooner.

Derek's eyes narrowed. There was no forgiveness in them. "What the hell do you want me to say?" And they were right back in the Hankel nightmare all over again. She would've never wanted to get that look from her teammate again. "I can't give you what you came here for." With those words he walked past her without giving her another glance. "I'm going out, before _I _say something I'll regret." Just before he slammed the door upon leaving she heard him start another attempt of reaching Spencer with his cell phone.

It wasn't until she was all alone, surrounded by silence that was so un-Spencer-like that it _hurt_, the tears finally came, one by one. Without her command her eyes fell to the shards of broken glass on the floor.

The cold inside her transformed into something much more horrifying and a foul taste filled her mouth, twirled on her tongue.

How the hell were they supposed to make it past this? How was she supposed to fix this?

She didn't know how long she stood there in that horrible, crushing silence until she finally regained her ability to move. Her feet were dangerously unsteady as she made her way to Spencer's couch, then slumped down and waited.

Waited for a miracle to happen.

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><p>'<em>To err is human, but when the eraser wears out ahead of the pencil, you're overdoing it.<em>'

(Josh Jenkins)

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><p><strong><em>End.<em>**

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><p>AN: Soooo, there you go. I'm not sure if that was any good as a fic, but at least I got the chance to blow off some steam. (grins sheepishly)

**PLEASE, **leave a comment to let me know your thoughts! This fic was a uncharacteristic 'spur of the moment' story from me, so it'd mean a lot to hear if this was any good – or if virtual heaven is calling it… (gives puppy's eyes)

Thank you so much for reading this! Who knows, maybe I'll be seeing ya guys around. (glances hopefully)

Take care!


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